Wait until someone mentions scalloped frets.
Then youāll be in a new world of trouble!
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Heeeey Brian,
And what do you think of scalloped frets ???
Good night 
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Haha, I carefully skirted around but did peep into the Yngwie Malmsteen rabbit hole when I looked this up 
But on a more common theme, Jumbo frets are more popular and you never touch the fretboard with them from what I gather.
Interestingly, this effect is more obvious to me with the thicker strings 
Your diagram is not even close to where your frets and string should be set. The strings are way too high.
Must new guitars are not āset upā for easy play. The strings are set high on a new guitar so the store can custom fit the neck and strings to fit your body shape and arm/finger lengths. Everyone is different so the guitar is āset upā for you.
When you play the strings you normally touch the wood fretboard. You canāt āpullā a string nor bend the strings without touching the fretboard. You only need to.press down enough to make a clear tone when you pluck or pick the notes. Any harder is a waste of time and strength. Your fingers should be a close to the frets as possible. If your guitar is set up properly; and your fret board is the right width for the size of your hand and fingers, you should be able to comfortably press down your strings to a clear clean tone without much effort.
If you live near San Angelo, TX I will setup your guitar correctly. I do this for lots of players for free. I will teach you how you can do it if you get an other guitar. I can also teach you many little tiny things you can do to make different sounds with ease. Email me at Lee@FBA.CC
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Your finger is still pressing against the wood, your still moving your finger on the wood in bends etc so it certainly does affect the feel.
It shouldnt though be effecting the string itself.
Pressing just lightly enough is a skill you need to work on!
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@brianlarsen great way to visualize.
I think it will instant AHA to many here!
let me build upon that insight
(excuse the crude MsPaint job )
I try to put my ginfer where the orange circle is, although that doesnt always work.
I learned to play on a Strat and Iām a notorious gripping string pusher.
I really had to learn to apply an efficient and soft touch
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You have that wrong, you want your finger close to the bridge end of the fret
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Ah yes, my lefty brain was thinking of my lefty neck while wanting to draw a righty.
derp; I corrected it 
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My problem is that the ānutā is usually sitting behind the guitar trying to press strings to the fretboardā¦
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Itās a diagram not a scale model. I exaggerated the height of the frets to make it easier to see the distance from the string to the fretboard.
No matter how high the āset upā the string still rests on the frets on either side of your finger when you play a note.
My point was not how to set up a guitar but how far your finger presses down when you do play a note/chord. My diagram 3 and Lievenās show the string doesnāt touch the fretboard at all. If you have callouses on your fingers the fleshy bit wonāt protrude past the string down to the board, so you wonāt be feeling the wood of the fretboard unless you are pressing firmly (in which case it will be going out of tune) or if you are trying to increase the pitch, as in a bend. Even with people who bend a lot, most of the notes they play will want to be āin tuneā so no fingers on the board.
Yes, you can (I just checked)- and for pull-offs you should.
Thanks for the generous offer of a setup, but I live a long way from Texas 
Sharing personal details like your email on a public forum is discouraged; you might want to edit that out. (Itās fine to share via messaging if you wish).
@RobDickinson I mentioned in the OP that if youāre not supposed to normally be touching the fretboard, it simply
Oh, and just for the record, I have lots of fretboard wear and tear on my beloved A min frets by the nut. Iām just trying to understand what Iām sāposed to be doing 
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Iām re-reading this topic after reading Brianās @brianlarsen Maple fretboards poll request.
I find my fingers donāt touch the fretboard on strings 6543 but do touch on the two light strings.
Most of the adverts for guitars talk about the āfeelā of the fretboard so the type of wood or wood substitute must be a factor.
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Gordon @sairfingers like you I followed the post to here and I am glad I did.
I was wondering yesterday after practice why my finger tips were hurting they donāt normally. I am working on finger style patterns and a song, so each picked note has to stand out, you can get away with it when strumming but not finger picking. Having just had go I realised I was pressing down way more than I need to. Thank Brian @brianlarsen
Michael
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I think this is spot-on!!! Thank you Lieven for your post, I really struggle to keep from pressing too hard & notice that it changes pitch of my notes sometimes. 
Tod
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Tha AHAs are rolling in
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Brian @brianlarsen , hope all is ok with your better half! Your alluding to gardening resulting in jail time reminded me of an old Marilyn Monroe movie:
Itās a fun watch!!!
(No guitars thoughā¦ 
)
Tod
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That water is well under the bridge and in the great big blue by now
I like old movies and will bookmark that for afternoons between lunch and nap
Cheers mate!
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Very interesting thread. Apologies for the length, but I think this is an absolutely crucial topic. In my opinion, whether you touch the fretboard at certain times or not, is incidental. People have all sorts of different ā topsā on their fingers; some thin, some fat and fleshy. As long as your finger placement is pretty close to the frets, ( where possible) youāre generally OK.
The important point is tension. Pressing the string just enough to sound a clear note, no more. Leave the dynamics etc to your picking hand.
Now, Iām no expert. Iām just speaking from my experience; but I have delved into this topic in some depth. Several months ago, I incorporated tension control as a specific daily focus item, as part of an alt picking/ hand synch course Iāve been doing. I knew I had way too much tension - better than it was - but, as my playing was getting better, its influence was becoming more obvious. And because I was now focusing on it to expose it, the amount of tension became glaringly obvious. Most noticeably on faster lead runs, faster chord changes, more intricate movements in general. But, it āinfestedā all my playing. Sometimes a bit of tension is required - for bends ,vibrato etc - but it also remained in my fingers after required, building cumulatively.
Iāll not bore anyone with my practice regime ( plenty of content online for resolving tension issues), but the upshot is my playing, most noticeably on faster, trickier sections, has significantly improved. I actually physically feel much ālighterā when I play guitar now, compared to say, 6 months ago. I am now also starting to feel a sense of āseparationā between the fretting and picking hand when playing dynamically, in the sense my fretting hand stays relatively relaxed, as my picking hand plays louder/ more dynamically as the song requires. So the hands are in synch timing-wise, but not tension-wise. Game changer right there. Also, because I play alot of blues stuff, I feel Iām better able to release the required tension needed for bending, vibrato etc, rather than it staying in my hand, and building up. Much more ongoing work to do for sure, and certainly none of the above is perfect 100% of the time, but the difference in 6 months or so is enormous from my perspective.
I would guess that 99% of people on this forum are playing with too much tension.
Cheers, Shane
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Guilty as charged!
I totally agree and try to spend some time in practice just feeling and listening to a fretted note, finding the right pressure and placement. Especially with cords. Complicated white more than one finger at a time. I am not at all where Shane is at this, but I think it is valuable to start early and often with feeling tension and touch.
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Pressing too hard is a learner skill you develop early.
Soft fingers and not being able to place them correctly means you compensate with a death grip. Esp if you start on an acoustic.
It does take effort to get past that
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Great explanation @sclay. Iām just at the point of having enough command of the instrument that I donāt have to think so much about the individual chords and notes and can listen to the sound. Just recently Iāve been working to cure the death grip problem. My fretting hand still āthinksā that when I play faster or louder I have to crush the fretboard. Iāve found that playing simple progressions at varying speeds and dynamics with my eyes closed helps me focus on lessening the tension and keeps things on pitch.
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