Sabotage from within

Being tired of playing on my own, a short time ago, i put up an add on a site, to look for other players, bands, jambuddies etc…

So yesterday, after some back and forth mailing etc, i meet up with other players. They formed a little band and were looking around for others.

All’s good, fine people, have a pint or two and head for their rehearsel space. (If that is the correct word).

Here it happens. They ask me; so, which blues songs do you know, or want to play? And i blanked out.
Next; no problem, we’ll do a standard 12 bar blues and you fill in with the rythm guitar.
Now i know i know some scales, i know a 12 bar blues progression, but again, i blanked out. At this time, i was getting very nervous.
Needless tot say that from that point on, i was pretty useless.

How do i get my nerves onder control? On the ride home, i was kicking myself for doing such a poor job.

How do i stop sabotaging myself like that?

Its probably with this, as in every other things with guitar doing stuff first time.
Freezes up,Forgets everything and all is just a blur…
i get very very nervous playin with others, and can very much relate… to me it gets a little better after a while when the worst nerves has settled.

Dont quit now… you are superlucky to have jam buddies. Give it some time and be honest to them about how you felt it… i am sure this will work out fine for you as long as you give it some time…
i am super jalous of you :grin: and best of luck!!

Hi GrytPipe,
Please correct me if I’ve read it wrong…But @tRONd Trond, I think this was an audition and you never actually have a second chance there…so
Grytpipe…have you ever recorded yourself and posted a video…or record yourself with the idea that you would like to post it…that brings stress to many (to me with some difficult as something like Angie from the rollingstones) and making a lot of mistakes…and so is a very good way to start learning to deal with stress in this area…And so more practice unfortunately…you’ve learned it the hard way now …But if you just keep breathing and practicing new opportunities will come with other players (or later with these) … so don’t give up…
Greetings ,Rogier

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Ahhhh… it was an audition… well thats a bummer… my bad @roger_holland

Well… you have done it once… second time around is easier maybe? :grin:


Very wise words… maybe it just wasn’t meant to be this time around… as Rogier suggests maybe practice recording yourself until you can overcome that Red Light Syndrome and do one takes… then maybe put yourself forward for one of the community open mics… then maybe take part in a local open mic… gradually build up your confidence up.

Maybe worth watching this

It sounds to me a lot like learning a new language. I’ve been trying to learn Welsh for a couple of years. The first time I tried to have a conversation with someone outside the classroom situation, I just went blank. Obviously later I thought of all sorts of ways I could have answered the questions they’d asked me.

So, much like with the language challenge, I’d guess the secret is to prepare some answers to the questions they might ask - think of a couple of songs you want to play with them and practise them. And then, much as the new language conversation gets more relaxed and starts to flow once you’ve managed a couple of sentences that aren’t nonsense, having played one of your well-rehearsed bits, you’ll relax a little and then the rest will (probably) flow.

All speculation of course, as I’ve yet to take the leap to playing with others!

Yep, @tRONd , @roger_holland it was an audition allright.

@Socio @roger_holland i’ve been thinking about recording and did some too, but bever posted because i found them not worth the effort.
But now that i came this far, and thinking about what @rossbd said, this might be something. It’s still awfully awkward to look at myself, but it will be one more bridge to cross.

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The other thing I forgot to mention:
While I was quite cross with myself at messing up my first Welsh conversation, what I decided to take away from it was that I had had my first Welsh conversation, and was therefore feeling pleased with myself for even having attempted it.
So rather than beating yourself up about stumbling through your first audition, maybe give yourself a pat on the back for getting that far. I aspire to be confident enough on the guitar to get the chance to mess up an audition!!


Hi GrytPipe,

I think going from playing alone to playing with several people you don’t know is a big step.

Have you ever tried playing in front of a friendly audience, like a friend or someone from your family? I think that should be an easier step to make.

(And of course I agree with the rest of posters about recording yourself and posting it, which would also help)

@rossbd :laughing: That is a great way of looking at it. Thank you for letting me see the other side of it. In that case, i’m looking forward to my second one to mess up… :slight_smile:

@Metalbrain Yep, did that last x-mas, when my wife (vocals) and me on the accoustic, “performed” Hard Times (Scabs song) after dinnner. (Pro tip: wine helps a lot!!):stuck_out_tongue_winking_eye:
But that went somewhat fine, allthough i remember fumbling a little part (don’t know the word for it in english though). It’s a little sequence of notes, somewhere halfway the song. Anyway, doesn’t matter that much.