Mercurial Thoughts

Just trying to string some new chords shapes I learned and like the sound of together into something. Some timing is off. I’m still working on the metronome with varying degrees of success. My head goes away with the lyrics and by the time I start listening to the best I’m a half step out…

Mercurial Thoughts

Just looking to try and make myself seem whole
Save my body, feed my mind, tend my soul
These mercurial thoughts wash upon this shore
They pull away at the sand beneath my feet and they won’t let go.

Clench my teeth, there’s comfort in this breeze.
Only do what I do…it’s what I thought you need.
Soon the sun will burn, and we’ll breath the air
It’s better by your side but even if you’re not, I see you there.

See your face with finite desire,
Nail along your spine, no need to force a smile
And endure the ebb and flow of existency,
Conscious in a cosmos, without mondaine complacency.


Hey Dom,
Jakers, I gave this a spin yesterday when it dropped but never got around to commenting.
Where is everybody? :thinking: It’s always a pleasure to click play on a song you know you’ve never heard before and you more often than not tick that box
First impressions: When the guitar intro started, I was reminded of Bowie’s Wild Eyed Boy from Freecloud (that’s good).
I’m glad you included the lyrics as they are not at all obvious and open to a variety of interpretations (also good). I ended up googling mercurial and mondaine :laughing:
For me this works well as an atmospheric piece (might benefit from a grainy home movie video to accompany) but I feel it’s missing something as a full song on its own. Just my tuppence (old currency).
Keep ‘em coming


Hey Dom, I’m a huge fan of your songwriting and style :clap: whenever I see an original posted up from you I always look forward to setting aside 10min with headphones on to soak it in. Another beautiful song, I would honestly happily pay for a ticket to see you perform live, I think you have a rare talent.

Please keep them coming :v:

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Hey Dom, I thought that was a really good original. Well played, sung and written.

I would agree with Brian. It reminds me a bit of the Verve which was a band I enjoyed listening to in their hay-day. I think it just needs that hook line chorus. You definitely have a way with words, well done, I enjoyed that very much.

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Hi Dom,

I really liked your song as well.

I agree with Lee. I would gladly pay for a ticket as well.

Here, I would somewhat disagree with Brian and James. I have now been listening to your song three times, the second and third time with the question would I like the song to have such hook line chorus as James says. Strangely, I feel that such chorus would not add anything but take away from the atmosphere.

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I feel it’s missing something too Brian. I’m just not sure what it is yet. I tried adding a piano. Didn’t work. Tried a bridge. Didn’t work. I don’t want a chorus. Perhaps a big solo near the end with someone more proficient than I.

Watch this space.

No charge for you Chazzo. :heart_eyes:

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Working on it Socio. Thanks for the feedback. I agree completely about the something. I’m just not sure about the something.

Hi Nicole,

Thanks for the feedback.

To add some context, the song is a conversation with someone very dear to me, perhaps more of a letter of explanation by me to them and observation by me of them. I felt I needed to explain a perspective while observing them grow in their own way. I’m wishing them the best of luck with the hope that they understand me a little better.

That’s a long winded explanation why I don’t want a chorus. (You don’t repeat a paragraph in a letter)

I’m glad you picked up on that.

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It sounds so intimate. Yes that was my first thought.

True, you don’t repeat yourself in a letter. But maybe, if you want to add something, there could be a repeating phrase ( with or without lyrics) where e.g. two chords or words very gently change throughout the song. Thus not repetition but only the most intricate variation of tone - in every sense of the word.

Never written a song and probably never will, but I have written a lot to people who are dear to me.


Thanks for the advice. I’ll see what I can do. I really appreciate your view.

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Every letter is a song. Add two chords and you’re there

And those two sentences are some that you might want to put into one of your next songs :slightly_smiling_face:

Seriously, they are so beautiful that I got goosebumps.

Yes, you are right. I agree.

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Dude, with this production quality, you can actually earn something on spotify. I’m serious.

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I think we might be a distance away from that but thanks for the vote of confidence.

People might stop sending me letters. Actually I think that happened in 1996…

What? :grinning:

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I gathered all the feedback and took what I could from it. Made a few adjustments and this is the outcome

  • created a video
  • I think I added some gravel
  • some repetition
  • rerecorded the vocals
  • added some bass

This is what happened…

Thanks to a lovely community and their constructive feedback. I love you all.


Won’t let go. Can’t let go. … Don’t let go :slightly_smiling_face:

See? It worked :hugs:

I love that the addition feels like waves washing on the shore. Fits the rest of the lyrics and the overall feeling of the song very well.

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Hi Dom,
In the first version there were some (high clitches???) that were difficult for me to listen to…this version is absolutely amazing and gives a pressure on my feeling/soul which I love.
:sunglasses: :clap: :man_bowing:

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