Hopefully you all had a great Christmas time!
I know, I haven’t been active here for a long time. First it was lots of stress at work and after some time - not playing guitar - developed into a really bad conscience that told me if you are not playing guitar, you have no business in this forum either.
But today something has happened that was and is such a huge shock and scare that I promise I will play guitar each and every day from now on, if that means that my husband will survive. That’s a good deal, isn’t it?
I had to call an ambulance for him today.
Here in Finland, as a family member you are discouraged from coming along to the emergency room and waiting there. Instead you are told to wait at home and wait for a call. Nobody called, and I haven’t been able to reach anybody. So in the end, after more than four hours, I thought who cares if they will throw me out they will. Went to the emergency room and experienced the shock of a lifetime.
My husband in a hospital bed with an oxigen mask on. Looking so helpless. They told me that they are just about to transfer him to an ICU unit of the most prestigious hospital in Finland.
I asked the nurses: If things are so bad, why did nobody call me? Oh well, yes, we thought that the doctor just called you. No. Nobody ever called.
They called the doctor to talk to me. She showered me with a load of medical mumbojumbo. The doctor confirmed to me that it’s life threatening and did not agree to tell me how big are the chances that my husband is still alive tomorrow.
Meanwhile my husband is at the ICU unit and they let me talk to him on the phone shortly. That’s when he said to me: “I’m too lazy to die”.
So, here I am scared and alone thinking this sounds like the title of a song “Too lazy to die”
That’s why I pledge here and now. I will play every day, be disciplined, stop avoiding the forum that I grew to love so much. If this only means that my husband will survive.
And at some point I will write a song for him. Too lazy to die.