Thank you @sairfingers Gordon, it is about trying to shut the brain up and just enjoy the moment. I don’t get to perform for many people so I should just be happy with the fact that I am.
Thank you @TheMadman_tobyjenner Toby. I’ll be doing some dry runs like Mark has suggested and now you as well.
You know I don’t indulge in the ‘you were great’ BS when I don’t think so, but I really enjoyed your song, Stefan. You are blessed with that je ne sais quoi (ask the mad one) that makes an entertainer.
It adds to the (audience’s) enjoyment to see the artist walk a tightrope, have a slight wobble and regain their balance continuing to the end. (Sure it can be fun to watch them plunge too, as long as there’s a safety net, but I think we are still to witness one of those).
Your playing, as well as multiple voice singing really worked. As Gordon said, it’s often towards the finishing line that we mess up (in many areas of life), and freakily enough often on the very last note! 
Toby and Gordon make good points about preparations. Learning how to play the song is only half the process. The closer you can practice everything that you are doing on the night, the better. This includes full recording of yourself in the room with the same equipment/platforms you will be using on the night, including intro/preamble, performance and outro. It’s much easier to be ‘spontaneous’ when it’s well-rehearsed 
Mistakes don’t worry me anymore, but I’m still afeared of the complete ‘brain freeze’ that sometimes happens (lyrics or chords)
Welcome to the club 
Thank you for your input Brian, it is much appreciated. I’ve not updated this thread to get plaudits from folk but it is nice to hear such things. 
I really do want to crack the issue I have, especially playing for the people on here, as I would just like to feel semi-comfortable doing it, just like I do when my wife is sat there and I just play without giving it a second thought.
I’m keeping at it, in hope that one day I will reach that point.
Amen to that brother !
Hi Stefan, I battle nerves too before the OMs. On my first one they hit me really bad and since then it has gotten much easier. I figured I’d share some things that have helped me in case they give you some ideas of things you can try.
I do my best to choose my song well in advance of the OM. That way I have plenty of time to get the muscle memory of the song set as much as it can be so even if I’m shaky, I have a better chance of playing through it. I also do at least two full run through sound checks on zoom before the day of the OM. One a couple weeks prior and then one two days before. That way I have an extra day before the OM to fix any tech issues that come up if needed.
What has also really helped me is to try and relax as much as I can the day before the OM. I run through my full song one to two times and then put down the guitar. I try to eat well, go to bed at a reasonable time and do my best not to stress over it. The OMs typically start at noon my time, so making sure I get good rest the night before has been important for me to perform at my best.
I really enjoyed your song and honestly did not notice any flubs. I am finding that mistakes are definitely more noticeable to ourselves than others that are watching. Hopefully you’ll find something that works for you!
Thank you for that Jennifer. There does seem to be a common theme of doing a full dress rehearsal on Zoom before the day, so I’ll be giving this a go this time round.
I’m glad you enjoyed the song and they do say we are our own worst critics.
Having played for a long time I still get nerves but I think they are now “natural” nervous energy and probably a good thing. Most of the stuff I play live is now stuff I’m very comfortable playing and singing so I’m not nervous about whether the song will go okay it’s just the “waiting to get started” type of nerves.
If I’m playing something live for the first time then I’m definitely more nervous. No matter how many times you practice it alone, playing live affects your focus and sometimes you think too much about what could go wrong. Once I’ve played it a couple of times live it tends not to be an issue.
If you can at all try and simulate the environment in which you would be playing I would do it. That may help.
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Our Open Mic events are superlatively good. They are a treasure of our little corner of the interweb from so many perspectives.
HOWEVER.
We are seeing people make many repeat appearances. And part of the drawback of that is the desire (a wholly understandable and natural one) to always play a new song so as not to simply present something already performed to the same audience.
What that means is that not one of us, whether a seasoned Open Mic veteran or someone who has only played at a very small number, is getting the comfort that Jason describes. A feeling of nerves that are natural but knowable. Nerves that precede a live performance but which can be assuaged in the knowledge that the material is tried and tested and has been played to an audience on multiple occasions already.
We are neophiles and that will always bring the ‘first-time nerves’ which are slightly different to the performer nerves that come before ‘another show’.
Wise words Richard.
In fact, because of the direction I have taken in development and practice, I’ve struggled to find “new songs” for the next OMs. And that “never done this one before” does add additional and different pressure. So I have taken to going back over past AOVYPs for songs that I have played before and perhaps never sung. That’s plan going forward, until I stumble on one of those “I have to do that” songs.
So folks should be comfortable using their “back catalogue” when looking for OM songs.
Be cool.
It’s the same audience though… playing the same song is going to get boring real quick. But I do agree with you. Makes more sense with different audiences.
After having been accused of ‘selling out’ and going mainstream at the last OM (Michael Stipe is pulling his beard out ), I may just have to revert to the old tried and tested formula of finding songs that no one knows what they are supposed to sound like, or even make them up if I’m stuck.
I’m with @jkahn on this. Even if it’s a song I’ve heard someone play before, I’m here to see where people are on their journey (like @DavidP adding in a loop to solo over) or watch the drummer sing etc.
I don’t really want to see a ‘comfortable’ performance on here.
It’s different if I’m in a pub, or even more so if I’ve paid for a gig.
Nothing wrong with a bit of nerves
Yes, I meant that. Sorry if I was unclear.
One other point that has already has some discussion. The Community Open Mics are now so popular that performers are getting a one-song slot. In real-life open mics that is virtually unheard of. Most people want and are given at least two songs. And from those two songs every performer will come away thinking one was better than the other. Allowing a glass-half-full mentality to accentuate the positives and a reflective mindset to consider how to improve where there were self-identified issues or flubs.
As a performer at a Community Open Mic you get one shot. And that is it. It can be seen as more challenging and more nerve-inducing in many ways than a real-life in-person event.
Mrs C and I used to frequent a monthly sing-around. Not an open mic as such, there was no mic and you performed from your seat. It was simply a room in a bar and an open invite to sit in the round and take a turn. The performer slot passed from person to person. You did one song, it passed on, the next person did one song and on and on. There were only ever a small number of people, usually the same core people, and the slot came back around multiple times in an evening. We often got the chance to play five or more songs each month. And for the subsequent month we always made sure we had at least six or seven new songs we could perform. Some people repeated one or two songs - mostly not in consecutive months though. There was one person who only knew one song and that is all he ever played. It got tiresome hearing it each month! It was a tall order preparing that many new songs every month so we worked at it and gave it the time it required to do ourselves justice.
More …
Some time ago I made a point of praising @tRONd and encouraging others to do what he did at an OM.
He spoke, grounded himself a little, played a few chords in a mellow little progression as he introduced things and got himself in the zone.
It can be tempting to launch straight in to guitar and singing when the spotlight comes around. Taking control of your moment is a way of managing your nervousness.
Also, everybody knows well in advance their position in the running order.
Nobody wants to miss a performance but I would encourage that performers sacrifice at the least the one immediately preceding performer slot and do a full warm-up before their turn comes around. What form that takes will be personal. Beyond tuning up you may want to do one more play-through of your song, or some finger stretch exercises or some guitar and vocal scale runs.Whatever it is, give yourself some minutes to be ‘stage ready’ before the camera is on you. You can catch up with the performer(s) that you missed by watching the recording when it gets shared.
Valuable insights there Richard & Jason, appreciate you sharing the wisdom of real life live playing and how it stacks up to the OMs.
That was partially what was behind my choice in OMXV to go with a song I’d already worked on and posted in AVOYP. I would like to play that at a live OM at some point this year so wanted to give it a try as a live performance to see how it felt. Even with that, and not actually having the benefit to adopt Trond’s approach you mention above, there are still things I’d like to work on with the song, timing especially. So maybe there’s value in encouraging repeating an AVOYP in the OM setting. I was concerned that it was already going to come over repetitive as I’d only posted the AVOYP 6 or so weeks ago, reality is only one audience member referenced it so maybe not as “boring” as I’d thought it may be.
@Notter Thankfully Mark, some of us are that old we can’t remember what happened yesterday, never mind six weeks ago.
Some great stuff posted above, so thankyou guys. I’m taking everything onboard and I will try and apply it in future OM’s.
The only thing I’m not sold on at the moment is doing a run through just before I’m up. I feel that if I make a mistake whilst doing that it will just add even more pressure to my performance.
Or…and this happened to me on Saturday and it’s definitely a mindset thing, take any mistakes in a warm up as getting them out of your system before showtime. The run throughs I did on Saturday afternoon were, frankly, terrible! But, coming to Richard and Jason’s points, having the knowledge that I’d put the practice time in led to a faith that it’d come good on the night. Bloody mind talking to ourselves!
in which case play something unrelated that will ease yo into it and get your fingers moving and your voice vocalising! 
I would always always play a run through BEFORE I’m up…it’s like a runner having a light jog before a race…gives your arms, hands and head a chance to lock in ready for playing live. It’s a bit like Richard says in a real OM you are going to - generally in the UK - get 15 minutes which is three songs. We always try to play a tried and trusted song first off to shake the nerves and rust off. Number 2 and 3 are almost always better.
@Notter if you’re going for a real OM go with that in mind 2-3 songs ready to play and ones you know like the back of your hand and as simple as can be.
Thanks Jason, advice certainly taken on board. I’m tempted to use the next couple of OMs I’m able to be at for this same purpose and get that back of the hand feel.
I’m still a fair way away from going for it but if you’re gonna do it, do it right!!
I would agree with this. Since I typically end up going close to last in the OM’s because of my time zone, I typically watch the early performances, but keep my guitar in hand so I can at least run pieces of my song on and off to stay warmed up. Then about 2-3 songs before my turn, I will run the whole thing through once or twice. It has been working for me to do it this way the last couple OMs. I will watch the video afterwards to catch anyone I wasn’t able to watch live.